


borrowed time.

by KitFistosBeard



Series: sequel trilogy revisted [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Eventual Smut, Fix-It, M/M, Movie: Star Wars: The Force Awakens, POV Poe Dameron, Pining, Slow Burn, Stormpilot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:34:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22380400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KitFistosBeard/pseuds/KitFistosBeard
Summary: “This has been the longest day of my life.” Finn half yawns half laughs. “Yesterday I was a stormtrooper, designated for reconditioning.”“And I was a prisoner doomed to die.” Poe says half-heartedly, thinking that he’s now on borrowed time.“I’m glad I found you, Poe.” Finn moves to sit closer to the other man. “And I’m glad you found me again on Jakku.” Poe instinctively reaches out for Finn’s hand.“Me too, buddy.” They stay like this for a while. Poe holding Finn’s hand, thumb running patterns over his palm. This is nice. Poe thinks, and his eyes slowly flutter closed. He realizes Finn is still sitting up on the bed. “Sleep with me, Finn?”
Relationships: Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron/Finn
Series: sequel trilogy revisted [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1672105
Comments: 9
Kudos: 117





	1. Day One.

**Author's Note:**

> Basically, I'm sorting through my disappointments with the sequel trilogy by writing Poe into more of it, emphasis on his gayness and relationship with Finn. I'm going through Force Awakens first, this will be multiple chapters, and if I'm feeling ambitious multiple works.
> 
> This is my first step into the world of fanfiction, be nice lol

7.1.1

When Poe wakes up, he’s surrounded by sand. His forehead’s burning, making him think that he must have been out under the hot sun for a while. He tries to remember what brought him here. It all comes back in quick succession. Getting captured on Jakku, the interrogation by the masked figure Kylo Ren, the stormtrooper who he thought was leading him to his death turning out to be the one to rescue him from the First Order. Finn! That was his name, or at least the one Poe gave him before they crashed. He had some number association, like a fucking computer. There was the crash next, Poe must have gone unconscious before hitting the planet’s surface. He doesn’t remember hitting his seat eject button, but he must have because he is now sitting, still strapped into his pilot’s seat but the rest of the ship is nowhere to be found. Still slowly coming to, he unbuckles the harness which keeps him attached to the chair, and he slowly and with great effort rolls to standing.

  
It must have been midday, Poe thinks to himself, what with the hot sun beaming down on him. There is nothing but sand in all directions. Fucking Jakku, the worst planet to be stranded on. In his daze, Poe just realizes that his rescuer, the stormtrooper, is nowhere in sight. Poe scrambles around the lone fighter seat, looking for any clue of his new friend or the ship they came in. A sudden chill comes over him, and he realizes he’s also missing his jacket. How did he manage that?

  
“Fuck, fuck.” Poe kicks at the sand helplessly. Lost, disoriented, he has no idea what his next step should be. Is BB-8 still on the planet? Is Finn somewhere nearby? Also thrown from the fighter as they plummeted to the surface? Seeing that any direction could be the right one, Poe starts off towards the sun. It sets in the west on Jakku, right? He tries to recall, unsure if he ever actually knew, but trying to find some bearings on his directions. As he walks, he comes across some half buried stormtrooper attire, thrown about as if someone was undressing while walking. A small flicker of hope rises in Poe’s chest. Finn. He made it too. If Finn’s headed this way, Poe’s sure he’ll find him. Hopefully near some water and maybe a bed.

  
Poe walks for what feels like miles, and he knows he’s in desperate need of water. He reaches the edge of a sand dune and looks out. A small tented area is just visible, and Poe sighs, holding on to the little hope that emerged when he found Finn’s trail. He pushes forward with the little strength he has left. The small outpost covered little area, and Poe hoped this means he’ll find out quickly if Finn made it here or not. He collapses next to a small water fountain, trying to collect himself before resuming his search. He hopes none of the locals would mind, although some are giving him some sideways glances. He rotates his tired body in order to reach out into the water. It was warmed by the sun, but a relief from the dryness of the sand all the same. Out of nowhere, Poe thinks he hears the high-pitched beeping of BB-8 and he looks up frantically, worrying he has finally lost it. Over on the other side of the fountain, a small lean girl with a staff is standing over a larger, dark man who looks absolutely beat. His arms up above his head, wrapped in the soft grey leather of Poe’s missing jacket. Poe shakes his head in disbelief. What forces kept bringing him and Finn together? And sure enough, next to the girl was his small, orange droid who was currently zapping Finn.

  
“Wait!” Poe tries calling out, but they’re too far to hear him. “BB-8! Finn!” He tries to get to his feet, but falls just as quick as he stands. Luckily, the droid seems to pick up on his feeble attempts to get their attention and swirls around in excitement. Poe stays collapsed, letting out an exhausted laugh as the droid comes spinning towards him. Finn and the girl stay where they are, confused expression plastered on their faces.

  
“I thought I was never gonna see you again!” Poe says happily as BB-8 speeds around him.

  
“Poe! Poe Dameron, you’re alive!” Finn yells, scrambling to his feet from where the girl had him pinned. Poe pushes himself up to fall into a hug with his fast friend, his rescuer from the First Order.

  
“Finn! I thought we were goners! I woke up, my seat ejected. I couldn’t find you or the ship. I couldn’t bear the thought of you dying rescuing me. And now you’ve found my droid! Buddy, how did I ever do anything without you.” Poe says all way too fast. He pushes back against the other man, trying to find his footing. “Seriously, thank you.”

  
“I woke up next to the ship, I thought you were still inside, but the sand sunk the ship before I could get to you! I thought you were dead!” Finn pulls him in for another hug Poe welcomes the support, and the strong arms of the ex-stormtrooper feel nice against him. Poe’s mind wanders for a second, before he becomes increasingly aware that he is dangerously dehydrated, and likely needs medical attention. The crash and desert walk really took their toll. And it’s not like he was in peak physical shape after Kylo’s torture either. Poe closes his eyes into Finn’s jacket. Wait no, his jacket.

  
“You found my jacket” He says, eyeing the tall man trying to be charismatic but exhaustion preventing it. Finn must have thought he was annoyed or something because he quickly began to try to take it off. “No, no. Keep it. It suits you.” Poe smiles up at him, biting his lip slightly. Finn grins sheepishly. Damn, through all the running-for-their-lives business Poe didn’t realize how handsome his rescuer was. “Consider it a thank-you gift, you know, for saving my life.”

  
“It was the –”

  
“The right thing to do. You mentioned that.” Poe and Finn were so wrapped up in each other, neither noticed the girl walk up to them so when she speaks, they both jump.

  
“So, the droid is yours, then?” She asks, and Poe turns to her. Up close, she looks young and unassuming. You wouldn’t have guessed she had had Finn pinned mere minutes earlier.

  
“Yes.” Poe says nervously, unsure of this new acquaintance.

  
“Be careful. I already had to fight three scavengers off him this morning.” She turns her attention to Finn. “BB-8 recognized your jacket on him. That’s why I attacked. I guess I owe you an apology.”

  
“It’s cool. It’s cool.” Finn shrugs, looking decidedly not cool. Poe chuckles, and turns back to the unknown girl.

  
“Thank you for protecting BB-8, but I have to ask. Why stick your neck out for an unknown droid.” Poe looks at her, she doesn’t look resistance. If he had to guess, he’d say she was just another scavenger.

  
“It felt like the right thing to do.” The girl sighed, “I know a thing or two about waiting on this planet for people to return.” Poe nods and glances at Finn, who’s looking at her with such a sense of longing in his eyes that something sparks in Poe’s stomach which catches him off guard. He shakes it and turns his attention back to the girl.

  
“Well, thank you. You both have saved my skin and mission. I’m Poe. Poe Dameron. This is Finn. What’s your name?” He asks, the girl observed them both hesitantly.

  
“I’m Rey. Just Rey.” She smiles mostly at Finn. BB-8 twirls under the three of them, trying to get Poe’s attention.

  
“Well, Just-Rey, hope you’re good with that staff. I think we’ve attracted some friends.” Poe says, looking beyond their unconventional troupe, to where two scavengers are leading some stormtroopers towards them.

  
“I have a better idea.” Rey says as she glances in the same direction. “Follow me, and fast.” And she takes off in the direction Poe had entered the outpost from. BB-8 rolls along with her, chirping at Poe to follow. Finn grabs his hand and reaching inside himself for adrenaline he didn’t think he had, Poe pushes himself to keep pace with his new companions.

  
“Rey!” Finn calls out, “Rey! Where the fuck are you leading us!” He yells as stormtroopers blasts wiz past them.

  
“There’s a ship just ahead.” Rey yells back, “We can escape them!” Poe’s adrenaline fully kicking in, he’s excited about this chance to escape. So many times today he thought his luck had run out. He’s never been so happy to be wrong. Just as hope creeps back into his chest, a loud movie overhead draws his attention, and two TIE-Fighters are firing on the ship is leading them to. The trio skid to a stop, horror stricken in their faces. “This way!” There’s another ship. Just hope it flies!” Rey turns 90 degrees and runs toward a silver cargo ship. Poe nearly stops running at the sight of it.

  
“No fucking way!” He laughs, maybe he is dead. And this is the afterlife. That’s the only conceivable way he’d be about to fly the fucking Millennium Falcon. BB-8 reaches the ship first and gets the landing ramp down. The three of them run up, still miraculously dodging fire. Once they’re all on board, Poe stumbles his week body threatening to finally give out completely. The escapes isn’t finished yet, he reminds himself, and runs/limps to the cockpit, to find to his dismay that Rey is in the pilot’s seat.

  
“What are you –” he starts, but a quick glare from the confident girl makes him rethink and sit in the co-pilot seat. Once they’re clear of these TIE-Fighters he can take over as pilot.

  
“Finn? You good?” Rey says into her Comm. Finn must be in the gunner position. If Poe remembers plans of this ship correctly, which he does. He only studied them religiously throughout his teen years.

  
“Figuring it out! Take off, Rey! Is Poe with you?” Poe puts on his Comm.

  
“Right here with Rey, buddy! We got this!” Poe says, helping Rey get everything ready for takeoff. “You fly this thing before?” He asks.

  
“No.”

  
“Have you flown anything before?” He asks, nervous for the answer, but none comes. Rey instead flicks a few switches, and suddenly they’re in the air. Poe focuses on his side of the switchboard, but there’s little for Poe to do. Maybe it’s just as well. Now that he is sitting, his body is now more aware of how exhausted it is. Not prime piloting shape.

  
“Finn! You have to shoot!” Rey’s shouts into the Comm wakes Poe from slipping. Poe’s suddenly back in the fight. They’re being chased by the same TIE fighters that took out their original ship, Rey’s doing some impressive evasive flying but they’re hot on their tail. Poe tries to think past his fog.

  
“We need to get out of the atmosphere. Jump to lightspeed.” He says to his new co-pilot.

  
“We need to shake these guys first. And I would, if you’d turn on the shields!” Rey shouts, not concealing her stress. Poe glances to his side, the shield controls are next to him. How did he miss that? He’s really gone. Quickly he flicks them on, and a soft whirring emerges on as the shields are activated.

  
“Finn! Why aren’t you shooting?” Rey shouts again, more frantic this time.

  
“Sorry, this is harder than it looks!” Finn’s panicked voice come in through the Comm, then suddenly loud blasts come from underneath the ship, and one of the pursuing fighters falls to the ground.

  
“Yes! Good job buddy!” Poe shouts out. “Let’s get out of here.” He glances over to Rey who starts the ship on an upward diagonal. Poe feels himself slipping back into his usual Commander self.

  
“Where to?” Rey says, glancing over to Poe, nerves wrecking her face. “I don’t know where to go.”

  
“Stay calm. I got this.” Poe pats her shoulder supportively. “Finn, buddy, try to take out the other fighter before we get out of Jakku’s atmosphere.”

  
“Okay.” Finn’s voice breaks in nerves on the other end of the Comm. Poe realizes that neither Finn nor Rey have likely ever seen a battle.

  
“I believe in you, buddy.” Poe says, as calmly as he can into the Comm. A few canon blasts later, their ship is no longer being followed. Rey sighs in relief.

  
“Good job, Finn!” She says, her voice breaking.

  
“Okay. Rey, we’re gonna need to jump to lightspeed fast. Who knows if the First Order ships are still up there.” Poe has taken over controls, hands flying as he puts in the coordinates for the resistance base. “You know where D’Qar is?” Rey snaps back out of her panic and nods, helping Poe set their course.

  
“I haven’t left Jakku since I was a child.” She says, a little distant.

  
“Well, I’m afraid we can’t go back now.” Poe says as he pushes a button and they jump to lightspeed.

7.1.2

Finn comes running out of the gunner position. Poe’s heart jumps slightly at the sight of the man, overcome with post-battle excitement and adrenaline. He runs towards Finn and the two men meet in an excited hug. Rey comes in to join them as BB-8 whirls around their feet.

  
“You guys did amazing!” Poe laughs, “Seriously saved my ass, again! Now I’m going to lay down for a minute.” Poe walks towards the bench in the middle of the ship.

  
“We did it! I can’t believe it!” Rey laughs and sits next to him. Her nerves turned to excitement now that they were safe. Poe laughs with her, but notices Finn looking troubled. His eyes off somewhere distant.

  
“Finn? You okay?”

  
“It’s just… I’ve been running on adrenaline since we escaped the Stardestroyer. And I’m only just realizing…” Finn stops himself. “These TIE-fighters, the stormtroopers I killed… What if I knew them? What if… What if they were like me?” Poe’s breath stopped in his chest. He was not prepared for his new ex-stormtrooper friend’s inevitable moral crisis.

  
“What are you talking about?” Rey says, “Aren’t you resistance? How would you know anyone from the First Order?” Finn looks away, shame plastered across his face. Poe stand up and embraces his friend.

  
“Finn. I know this is hard. Hell, probably harder than anything I will ever have to face.” Poe lifts Finn’s face to look at him in the eyes, ignoring the butterflies that emerged when he cupped Finn’s beautiful face. “If you didn’t shoot down those ships, we’d all be dead. Sometimes war has an ugly cost.”

  
“But killing those two pilots didn’t end the war. The First Order still rules.” Finn whispers, “What if they were taken as children, like me? None of us had any choice. The First Order took that from us.” Finn’s eyes were tearing up now, threatening to spill. Poe brought his other hand to Finn’s face.

  
“You can now help be a part of the force that’s working to stop the First Order from taking any other kids. You can redeem all those stormtroopers whose lives were stolen. You have hope now, Finn. You have a choice.” Poe holds Finn’s gaze, and he’ll hold it til the beautiful, brave man believes every word. Being this close to Finn, Poe has half a mind to fill the little space left between them with a kiss. That tension builds inside him, demanding to be heard. Finn’s tear-streaked cheeks flush slightly, and Poe blinks slowly.

  
“Wait.” Their moment is interrupted by Rey, whose still sitting on the bench, arms crossed. “Finn. You were a stormtrooper?” Her voice conveys shock, not judgement. But Finn still looks away. Poe grieves the intimate moment lost.

  
“Yes.” He chokes out, “But I wanted out. So when my unit captured Poe, and I knew he was a pilot. I took the opportunity.” Rey just nods, and after an uncomfortable silence she stands to meet Finn and Poe in the middle of the room.

  
“That’s really brave, Finn.” She grabs his arm. He looks down at her shocked, as she pulls him into a hug. He finally lets the tears go. Poe is so overwhelmed with feeling for his friend, and exhaustion from the longest day of his life. He barely registers that Finn has grabbed a hold of his hand. Suddenly, the ship jolts out of hyperdrive. The trio is pulled forward and back, the sudden movement nearly knocking them off their feet.

  
“How the fuck –” Poe says collecting himself to his feet.

  
“It must be the reactor.” Rey says confidently. “Unkar Plutt messed with it. I knew that it was a mistake” She continued muttering to herself as she ran to the cockpit. Poe is quick on her heels. Sure enough, the hyperdrive had defaulted back to neutral, pulling them out of lightspeed.

  
“What the fuck?” Was all Poe could get out.

  
“Unkar installed this as a fuel-saving measure, the cheap shit.” Rey points to the mechanism over the hyperdrive. It’s a reactor –”

  
“I know my ships, thank you.” Poe interrupts her. “But why would he do that to this ship? That’s basically a sin.”

  
“This ship? This is just cargo junk. Unkar won it, it’s nothing special.” Rey says absent-mindedly as she focuses on disengaging the reactor.

  
“Rey.” Poe scoffs, but then stops himself. Not everyone was a single-mindedly obsessed with the legendary ships of the rebellion and the heartthrobs that flew them. “Rey, this is the Millennium Falcon.”

  
“You’re joking.” Rey says in disbelief. “I did not just fly the Millennium Falcon.”

  
“You sure did.” Poe smiles at Rey’s excited, unbelieving expression. “I’d recognize it anywhere. Han Solo and Leia flew it to my home planet, Yavin IV, once when I was really young.” Poe says, remembering that fated day. It was the same day he realized he definitely had a crush on the hero Han Solo. He blinks back to the present, Rey is looking at him in awe. Just then, the ship begins to pull back. Poe frantically looks at the controls, everything is down. Another ship has overridden them.

  
“Shit! We’re being boarded!” Poe slams his fists and runs back to where Finn is sitting with BB-8 on the floor. “Finn! Come help! There must be some weapons on this ship.” Finn snaps to his feet and helps in the search.

  
“Guys! Guys! The main door is opening!” Rey calls in a panic. The three meet in the center of the room. Finn reflexively grabs Poe’s hand and he has to stop his stomach from doing a somersault.

  
“Okay, I found one blaster.” Poe takes a deep breath. “Stay behind me. We got this” BB-8 twirls to attention next to Poe, unsheathing his arm with a zapper attached. Finn moves his hand from Poe’s onto his waist, trying to stand strong. Poe can’t help but lean back a little into Finn’s hands despite the tension of the current moment. Rey pulls out her staff. And the trio prepares for whatever on the other side of the doors.

7.1.3

Poe’s mind is exhausted. He knows that if the First Order comes banging through those doors, their escape is over. He will fight to his last breath though. No way will he be recaptured, subjected to more torture at Kylo Ren’s hand. Finn still has one hand on Poe’s waist. The touch is comforting, Poe decides. Rey steadies herself next to Poe, everyone’s a little fidgety waiting for this door to open. Poe sighs, almost impatiently. The main hangar door swings open. Poe nearly lets out a laugh.

  
“Han Solo?” He says, lowering his blaster slightly.

  
“Who’s that?” The older man says as he enters the vessel, a tall hairy creature who can only be the wookie Chewbacca enters behind him. Rey glances from Poe to the newcomers. Finn refuses to let go of Poe. Poe is still smiling in disbelief.

  
“You’re Han Solo. This is your ship. Sorry to meet you like this. “Poe steps forward, forgetting himself and Chewbacca growls fiercely at him.

  
“If you’re right, why shouldn’t I shoot you for stealing my ship?” Han asks, walking past the trio eyeing them up individually.

  
“We didn’t steal it!” Rey exclaims, “We – We borrowed it. Or I guess, stole it from Unkar Plutt! On Jakku!”

  
“Jakku?” Han interjects, clearly disgusted. Chewbacca lets out a low growl as well.

  
“Please. we were escaping the First Order.” Finn interjects. “There was no time to think.”

  
“We need to get back to D’Qar.” Poe says calmly. “To Leia.” Han glances at him, then walks over. He’s got a couple inches on Poe, and Poe has to maintain composure as he looks up at his childhood crush.

  
“Do I know you?” Han asks warily.

  
“I’m Poe Dameron.” Poe offers, but Han shrugs unimpressed.

  
“Yeah, Leia mentioned you once or twice. Best pilot in the resistance? I’ve done my time with cocky pilots. Don’t need one flying my ship.” Han turns away. Chewbacca grunts something in response to this and Rey lets out a small giggle. Han turns to Chewbacca.

  
“Well, Chewy you can’t go around saying stuff like that if they’re gonna understand you!” He gestures towards Rey but Chewbacca just shrugs. “What’s your name?”

  
“I’m Rey.” Rey looks down at her feet. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh.”

  
“It’s alright. Chewy loves an audience for his jokes. It’s been just the two of us for a while and I don’t find them too funny.” Han says with a slight smirk. “Who’s the quiet, brooding one?”

  
“I’m Finn.” Finn says simply. “We’re trying to get to D’Qar, and fast. The First Order –”

  
“—is probably tracking this ship as we speak. It’s the most easily recognizable ship in the galaxy. Mr. Poe here can probably confirm.” Han says, putting his blaster back in its holster. “I overrode your controls, so no one can track you now. Because if we could find you on our sensors, sure as hell the First Order was waiting for you to lead them right to the resistance base.”

  
“Shit. You’re right.” Poe puts his blaster away as well. “I’m so exhausted, I didn’t even think –”

  
“Listen flyboy. Everyone needs to sleep.” Han laughs, a new warmth in his eyes. “I think you guys should be alright from here, with us. We can take you to Leia on our freighter. It won’t be tracked. Sound good?” Han doesn’t wait for a response as he leads the group out of the Millennium Falcon into the freighter that boarded it.

  
“I’ve been doing freight deliveries for the resistance, while keeping an eye out for the Falcon on the sensors.” Han says, “ever since it was stolen by some old buddies from my smuggling days.” Poe looks at the man, the legend, in admiration. “You can rest in one of the boarding rooms down the hall if you’d like. You all look like you’ve seen better days.”

  
“You’re so kind, Han!” Rey was practically beaming as she follows behind the man.

  
“Yeah, well, don’t tell anybody.” Han laughs. “Poe, you look like a dead man walking. Go rest, pretend that’s an order.” Poe nods absently. Finn hooks his elbow under his arm and leads him towards the long hall with small doors. Finn opens the first one they come to. The room is a tight fit with a small cot up against one wall. Poe has never been happier to collapse into a bed. Finn sits at the foot of the bed.

  
“Thank you, Poe.” He begins searching for words. “For what you said earlier on the Falcon. I needed that.”

  
“Finn, buddy. I would be dead if not for you. I would do literally anything for you.” Poe says as he lays, staring up at the younger man, who still looks stressed.

  
“This has been the longest day of my life.” Finn half yawns half laughs. “Yesterday I was a stormtrooper, designated for reconditioning.”

  
“And I was a prisoner doomed to die.” Poe says half-heartedly, thinking that he’s now on borrowed time.

  
“I’m glad I found you, Poe.” Finn moves to sit closer to the other man. “And I’m glad you found me again on Jakku.” Poe instinctively reaches out for Finn’s hand.

  
“Me too, buddy.” They stay like this for a while. Poe holding Finn’s hand, thumb running patterns over his palm. This is nice. Poe thinks, and his eyes slowly flutter closed. He realizes Finn is still sitting up on the bed. “Sleep with me, Finn?”

  
“What?” Finn looks down at Poe, looking slightly shocked. And Poe realizes what Finn thinks he’s asking him.

  
“Oh, no, no, no!” Poe sits up slightly. “Not like that! I mean, literally sleep next to me. Unless that’s too weird for you. I just – don’t want to be alone right now.” Poe looks down at the floor, but Finn grabs his cheek and lifts to force Poe to meet his eyes.

  
“Of course, Poe. I’ll stay with you.” Finn smiles at him, and Poe relaxes. The two lower to lie down facing each other. This feels incredibly intimate but considering what the pair has been through in the last 24 hours, maybe it’s appropriate. Poe’s final vision he closes his eyes is Finn’s face gazing back at him, trying to sort through the day’s events.

  
“Sleep well, Poe. You sure as hell deserve it.” Finn whispers as Poe finally drifts off.


	2. Day Two.

7.2.1 

When Poe wakes up, he’s alone. He takes a minute to remember where he is and how he had gotten there, as he usually does when waking up in an usual space. He hears the distant laughter of Rey, which he finds comforting. Standing, his joints tight and sore from his escapades the previous day, he was better rested now, and good thing too because he has to get back to his base with BB-8. There’s a knock at the door, and Finn’s head appears as the door creaks open. The man looks at Poe hesitantly.

“Hey, you awake? We’re about to land. Han wants to refuel, plus he said there’s someone on the planet we should meet.” He sits at the foot of the bed, mirroring where he was last night. Poe nods sleepingly, collecting his shoes off the floor.

“Did he say who?” Poe yawns.

“No, but I also didn’t ask.” Finn shrugs. “Han didn’t seem too interested in telling me too many details either.” Finn rolls into the bed.

“You going back to sleep?” Poe asks, although a small part of him wished that Finn had stayed longer with him earlier, so that he could have woken up next to Finn.

“I was sleeping when you did, just got up like five minutes ago. But I’m still so exhausted, this cot might as well be a feather bed.” Finn says through a smile. Poe chuckles, realizing that despite their quick adventure and saving each other countless times, he still barely knew the handsome ex-stormtooper. Maybe he should before he falls further head over heels.

“Finn. How are you feeling, buddy? Still shaken?” Poe didn’t even know where to start. How do you ask a man who had no identity until a day ago about himself?

“A little. But I am doing better. I’m just glad we both made it out.” Finn smiles up at a standing Poe. “Thank you again, Poe.”

“You don’t have to thank me, buddy.” Poe says opening the door fully, glancing out into the hall. “Let’s go find the others, I want more information on the pit stop Han has planned.” Finn follows Poe as they make their way to the central area of the freighter, which is quite large, considering it is holding both the Falcon and a multitude of other rooms and hallways as far as Poe can see. Chewy is laying down on a couch that’s built into the wall. Rey and Han are sorting through parts, voices tense.

“I’ve had the Falcon for thirty years, and you’re gonna try to tell me what’s wrong with it?” Han says in a tone that’s equal parts annoyed and amused. 

“I’m just saying, there’s been some mods done. I might be able to help!” Rey says defiantly. “Besides, when was the last time you saw the Falcon?” Han snaps her a look, and Poe decides to step in.

“Alright calm down you two. We’ll get everything sorted. Han, Finn tells me you’re stopping down somewhere?” Poe calms his nerves as he addressed his hero. “That’s dangerous. We might be spotted. We have to –”

“Not enough fuel to get this monstrosity of a freighter to D’Qar, flyboy.” Han interrupts him and picks up another piece of machinery off the table. “Plus, I want to repair some of the damage Rey’s scavenger friends did to my ship.”

“Yeah but how –”

“You can trust Maz. She’s a good friend of Leia’s. If anything, I’m the one who has to watch my back with her.”

“Why?” Rey interjects. “If you’re both with the resistance –”

“She’s not too happy with how I left things with Leia. Let’s just put it that way.” Han says, and heads off towards the Falcon which is parked in the main hangar. Rey follows frantically, with the new part Han had picked in hand, muttering something about reactors.

Poe sits at the empty table. He was on base the day Han had left. It was right after the news of the fall of Luke Skywalker’s new Jedi Order had arrived. Leia was beside herself, and Poe had never felt so helpless. He could understand why Han would be hesitant to confront that again, even indirectly through this Maz character.

Finn comes and sits next to Poe, leaning his head against Poe’s shoulder. Poe isn’t sure how to interpret this new move. Unsure of Finn’s history of intimacy in the First Order, maybe this is simply companionship to the younger man. But Finn did know the implications of “sleeping with” a person when Poe accidentally misspoke last night. So maybe, there is something in this move. Regardless, Poe’s stomach is doing somersaults and his heart is racing. He closes his eyes. When in the last 24 hours did he find time to develop feelings for Finn? If the other resistance pilots could see him… Oh the jokes they’d make. Poe Dameron, the hopeless romantic disguised as a hotshot flyboy.

“Hey Poe.” Finn says, grabbing Poe’s hand and stroking his palm with his own thumb, like Poe had done for him the night before. “Tell me about the resistance. All I know is what the First Order told us. I want a firsthand account.” Poe nods, his chin stroking the top of Finn’s head. This is intimate. This is nice. Maybe, it’s exactly what Poe needs right now.

“Where should I start, buddy?” Poe asks, repositioning slightly so his arm is wrapped behind Finn. It’s so easy to be this close to him. Poe thinks to himself. I have to watch myself, he probably doesn’t even know the possible implications. He can’t imagine the First Order tolerated much in the ways of Romance, even if Sleeping With people was on the table.

“How did you get into it?” Finn asks, sinking into their new position. Both men glad for the moment of rest, allowing Rey and Han to argue over Falcon repairs. Had it been any other day, Poe would have been right there with them. But in his current state, he was happy to sit arms around his new friend and tell him stories of his mom, the rebel pilot, of the Republic Academy, of being recruited by Leia to join the resistance. Poe smiles at the look of wonder in Finn’s eyes, and gulped knowing he was a goner already.

7.2.2

Poe had never been to Maz’s Cantina, but he might as well have. It had a familiar cast of characters, dodgy traders, and people looking to hide in the shadows. Poe’s uneasiness that anyone with First Order sympathies would betray their position was agitated by the short orange alien who would turn out to be Maz announcing Han Solo’s arrival to the entire cantina. So much for keeping a low profile. Poe keeps a nervous hand on his blaster, and eyes out on on the patrons as Maz and Han talk.

“Han Solo.” Maz says, contempt filled her voice. “You don’t see your own wife in five years yet I am obliged to receive you here.” She shakes her head. Han smirks, but his eyes betray his sadness.

“Doing stealth deliveries for the resistance keeps me busy. What can I say?” Han leans back in his chair. Chewy grumbles sadly.

“I did miss you, Chewy.” Maz says, turning her attention to the wookie. “Always keeping our friend Han here in check.” Chewy seems to perk up at this. Poe has had enough of the pleasantries, his mission isn’t complete until BB-8 is back with Leia, the map safely delivered.

“We need fuel to get back to Leia, on D’Qar.” He interjects.

“And quickly, there’s little chance we haven’t already been spotted.” Finn adds, Poe smiles up at his unexpected support.

“Your friends are in a rush, Han.” Maz observes Poe and Finn. Her gaze is piercing, making Poe look down to his feet uncomfortably. “Another delivery finally taking you back to Leia.” 

Rey is also starting to look nervous. “The sooner we get BB-8 back to D’Qar the sooner I can get back to Jakku and –”

“Back to Jakku?” Finn exclaims.

“I’ve been gone too long already.” Rey searches for words carefully, “If they came back for me and missed me. I’ve… I’ve waited for so long.” She glances around the table, searching for a sympathetic face, finding only confusion.

“The belonging you seek isn’t behind you, but ahead.” Maz says knowingly, Poe shoots her an awkward glance. 

“Rey, we blew up that outpost. You can’t go back. The First Order –” Finn starts then alters at the heartbroken look on Rey’s face. She gets up and storms off.

“Great, that’ll make it easier to leave.” Poe says, throwing up his arms in frustration. Finn stands to follow after their wounded friend, shooting Poe a dirty look. Poe scoffs in annoyance.

“Han!” Poe says helplessly.

“We’ve got time. The ships filling up as we speak. Relax.” Han waves Poe dismissively which only emphasizes his annoyance. Poe stands up from the table and stomps off, searching for his friends. He hates feeling like a sitting duck, and that’s exactly what they are right now. And now they’re separated sitting ducks. He spots Finn across the entranceway, where cruisers and ships are packed in. Finn is talking to a red alien next to a small cargo ship. Poe sees Finn gulp when the two make eye contact. This can’t be good. 

“Finn? What are you doing?” Poe approaches the unfamiliar cargo ship. The alien captain eyes him nervously.

“Poe. I – I need to escape. Run from the First Order. I can’t go with you. What you guys, the Resistance, do. It’s – it’s suicide.” Finn refuses to make eye contact with Poe, who’s shocked into silence. “And I can’t fight them. It’s too hard. I need to run.” Poe pulls his frightened friend away from the eavesdropping alien.

“Buddy. I know you’re scared; I know this is hard. But we need you. The resistance needs someone with your –” Poe starts.

“I’m not going to be another piece in this war machine. For either side.” Finn stops him and pulls against Poe’s grip on his arm.

“I need you.” It escapes Poe before he has better sense. “Finn… I need you.” The young man finally meets his gaze and suddenly it’s just the two of them. Finn grabs a hold of Poe’s forearm.

“Come with me. We can escape together.” Finn whispers. Poe allows himself to think of a future with Finn, one free of war. Exploring their newfound companionship further, continuing their earlier intimacy, maybe even kissing, falling in love. All luxuries Poe never considered available to him, now a possibility with the man in front of him. Then reality kicks back in, and Poe steps back, breaking his gaze from Finn’s.

“I’ve been in this fight for too long. I need to see it to the end.” He sighs, horrified by the tears threatening to spill over. “Finn, please.” He pleads.

“You’ve made your decision. I’ve made mine.” Finn’s face was equally pained, and Poe felt something heavy in his chest. Their tense standoff was broken by shots being fired overhead. Both men reach for their blasters instinctively.

“Well looks like we’ve been found out.” Poe says as he runs for cover, Finn quick on his heels. “Where’s Rey?” They stumble behind a control console on the tarmac. “Finn?”

“No clue. I lost her when I got outside.” Finn fumbles with the unfamiliar blaster in his hand. 

“For fuck’s sake.” Poe’s emotions are all over the place. and he feels trapped. “Looks like your buddy’s taking off, don’t wanna miss your escape.” Poe gestures to the red alien frantically running onto his ship. Finn looks guiltily at him, but Poe has no time for comforting his friend despite his instinct to. 

“I’m not leaving you like this, Poe. I thought you guys were safe –”

“You said it yourself. Never safe from the First Order.” Poe interrupts, apparently not done making Finn feel guilty.

“Poe!” Finn yells out, “Watch out” He stands and shoots at two incoming stormtroopers. Poe looks up at his friend.

“You’ve got to stop saving my life. It makes it difficult to stay mad at you.” Poe laughs, and stands next to Finn. They’re back-to-back, assessing their surroundings.

“I see Chewy and Han!” Poe yells out, “Follow me!” He grabs Finn’s hand and the pair run off in the direction of the old freighter.

“What about Rey?” Finn cries out. “We can’t leave without her.” The two dodge a shot from an oncoming trooper.

“Traitor!” The trooper calls out and makes a beeline for Finn. Poe pushes himself in front of his friend and shoots down the trooper. He turns to Finn, visibly shaken.

“Stay with me, Finn!” Poe pulls him forward. He’ll get them off this planet, he promises himself. “Keep an eye out for Rey.” The mention of Rey seems to perk Finn up, much to Poe’s chagrin. But no time for that now. Stay alive first, jealousy second. The pair gets to the ship just as Han drops down the landing ramp.

“Where’s Rey?” Han calls out. Chewy shoots down some incoming troopers.

“We don’t know!” Poe yells back, turning his back to the ship.

“We can’t leave without her!” Finn interjects as he dodges fire. Poe panics. He doesn’t want to leave without Rey either but they’re getting cornered. He takes a second to glance at Finn, this realization also painted across his face. 

“Finn. She’ll show up.” He whispers, “Hold on hope.” Finn glances at him, tears threatening to spill over. Just then, a new ship flies by overhead. Poe hardly believes his luck. There are a number of X-wings coming towards them. He can’t help but let out a shout. Finn stares up in disbelief. He looks at Poe, a small smile appears, and Poe reaches for his friend’s hands. Finn’s gaze moves past Poe and his face changes to horror.

“Rey!” He shouts and runs past Poe. Poe turns to see where he’s headed. Rey is being carried onto a First Oder ship by a masked figure. Poe’s stomach sinks as he recognizes Kylo Ren. He then registers that Finn is running full force towards the intimidating figure. Poe’s heart starts racing and next thing he knows he’s running towards Finn. Their path is blocked by a couple of troopers. One of which knocks Finn to the ground. Poe shouts out and shoots the offending trooper down. 

“Finn! Finn!” Poe yells as he reaches his friend and shoots down the other trooper. “Finn, you okay? Stay with me buddy.” He looks down at his friend, a little disoriented but conscious. He helps him to his feet and they both watch helplessly as Kylo’s ship takes off. Finn cries out, but it’s no use. Rey’s been taken.

“No! Rey!” Finn steps towards the ship but Poe grabs his hand. “Poe! What do we do?” 

“Let’s get back to the ship, buddy.” Poe pulls his frantic friend towards him. “Finn, listen. Finn, we need to get off this planet.” Finn resigns to be led back to their ship. Han is still holding the landing ramp for them, but he’s looking annoyed.

“Get on the fucking ship, boys!” He says as he shoots past them. “Now!” They all run onto the ship. Chewy is already prepping the controls to take off. Han pushes past Poe to sit next to Chewy. Poe feels helpless, not being able to fly in this battle. Maybe it’s for the best, he can instead focus on comforting Finn, who is sitting with his head between his knees. BB-8 spins concerned next to him.

“Hey buddy. We’ll get her, okay? We’ll get her back.” He wraps his arms around Finn as Finn lets out a small sob. Poe holds Finn close, stroking his hair. “It’s okay, it’s okay.”

“Poe! Finn!” Han calls out, “Someone go to the gunner position! We gotta fight back!” Han shouts frantically. Poe looks at Finn, who’s so obviously out of commission. Poe rests his chin on Finn’s head for a second then runs to the gunner. Once he’s plugged in to the Comm., he gets a feel for the gun. He’s a better pilot but at the moment he’ll make a decent shot. 

“Poe, you good?” Han says into the Comm.

“Yes, let’s just get out of here.” Poe says.

“Black Squadron reporting in, unidentified freighter please identify yourself.” A new but familiar voice enters their Comm. The freighter must have found itself on the same frequency as the x-wings.

“Wait – Poe?” Another voice cuts in, Jessika, a member of his squadron says in disbelief.

“Hey Jess! Good to hear you.” Poe says in disbelief. “Let’s get back to base.”

“You say that like you’re flying the ship.” Han interjects, which invites some laughter from the other pilots. As the ships fly away from the cantina, a sharp blast seemingly coming from nowhere shoots the entire castle down. This cuts their laughter. Poe looks on in horror.

“Where the fuck did that come from?” He asks the question that’s on everyone’s mind.

“I don’t know, but this can’t be good.” Han replies.


	3. Day Three.

7.3.1

Back on the resistance base on D’Qar, Poe is wrapped in a giant hug with his squadron. It’s nice to be back with them even though it feels like he’s changed exponentially on his latest mission. Finn hangs back as Poe is reunited with his friends. Poe pushes the rowdy group aside and gestures towards Finn to come towards him. Finn eyes him nervously.

“Finn! Everyone, this is the man who saved my life.” Poe pulls Finn into a side hug. “Finn, meet everyone!” Finn looks around, incredibly overwhelmed by the number of smiling faces around him.

“Finn! So good to meet you!” Jessika smiles up at the man, Poe eyes her nervously knowing she likes to make trouble for him.

“So we gotta blame you for him now, eh?” A tall pilot, Snap, playfully pushes Finn’s shoulder.

“What?” Finn stares at Snap and Poe pulls him in closer.

“Ignored Snap, Finn. He’s just joking.” Poe pulls Finn towards the entrance to the base, hoping to put some distance between the exhausted man next to him and the entirely all-too-much crew around them. 

“You can barely keep your hands off him, Poe!” Jessica teases, “When’s the wedding?” This earns some laughter from the other pilots. Finn looks a little uncomfortable but thankfully for Poe’s heart, he doesn’t make any effort to move away from him.

“It’s nice to meet everyone but I’m ready to pass out.” Finn finds some of his charm. “Excuse us.” He pulls Poe towards the entrance which makes Poe’s heart skip a beat and the pilots erupt into coos and laughter. Poe knows he’s gonna get roasted next time he and the pilots run drills. BB-8 trills behind the two, unhappy to not have their attention.

“Hey BB-8, run ahead and give the map to the General, okay?” Poe kneels down to the droid’s level. “We made it home, buddy.” He stands back up to Finn as BB-8 rolls away. He’s smiling but his eyes are worried.

“We need to get Rey.” Finn whispers, “We need to save her.” He sounds so desperate, and the break in his voice makes Poe wants to protect this man from everything that might cause him to make that noise again.

“We’ll go talk to the General and get a plan going. We’ll get her back. I said we would, right?” He grabs Finn’s face so they’re looking eye to eye. Poe’s fully aware they’re still within full view of the pilots and imagining their quips right now, but that doesn’t matter now, what matters is Finn. 

“Okay. Let’s talk to the general. Now.” Finn breathes in deeply. “I don’t want to be too late for Rey.” Finn breaks Poe’s gaze and walks into the base. Poe follows in behind and realizes Finn doesn’t actually know where to go. 

“This way, buddy.” Poe pulls on Finn’s elbow, linking their arms. Finn smiles at him.

“Thank you, Poe. You’re the best.” Finn keeps his arm linked with Poe’s and they walk this way to the base headquarters. Poe only lets go to open the door for his friend. General Leia is sitting, looking at the map BB-8 brought her. A collection of other Resistance generals and higher-ups surround her. Han is leaning against the far wall on the opposite end of the room from Leia. Poe looks up at the holographic map.

“It’s not complete.” C-3PO states matter-of-factly. Poe sighs, all that and for only part of a map.

“If Luke wanted to be found, we’d have found him already.” Han says dryly. Leia sighs next to him, an obvious tension still present between them. 

“Leia – General.” Poe remembers himself. “This is Finn. He –”

“Han told me about Finn. Thank you, son.” General Leia walks over to them and takes Finn’s hands in hers. “You helped us all immensely.” 

“Thank you, General but I need your help. Our friend Rey was taken by Kylo Ren.” Finn says desperately. “We need to save her.” Leia nods, matching Finn’s intensity, looking over at Poe.

“We’ll get her back.” Leia squeezes Finn’s hands. “Let’s make a plan. Poe, any ideas?” Poe and Leia have had a familial relationship since his own mother died, before he joined her in the resistance. He meets her gaze and knows she can see all his fear and exhaustion. Despite his intense need for a nap, he leaps into plans for Rey’s rescue. They incorporate the rescue into the plan for the attack on Starkiller base, the planet-destroying weapon that took out the New Republic threatens the Resistance’s existence itself. Finn proves himself valuable in this regard, telling Leia and the other leaders everything he knows about the First Order, Starkiller base, anything and everything. 

“So, it’s decided.” Leia says at the end of their hours long meeting. “Han, Chewy, and Finn will break into Starkiller, disable the planetary shields, and rescue Rey. Poe will lead the air attack. Everyone clear?” Leia pauses for a moment and when no one speaks up she nods. “Okay everyone, positions in fifteen minutes.”

Poe sighs and looks to his side, Finn is looking back at him nervous. Poe grabs his hand and offers a comforting smile. He wishes that he could go with Finn and watch over him, but his place is with black squadron. Finn squeezes his hand and takes a deep breath. Out of the corner of his eyes, Poe sees Jessika and Snap eyeing him, smirks painted all over their faces. He turns his attention back to Finn.

“Hey, we have a little time. Wanna find a quiet spot? Collect ourselves a bit?” Poe asks, not unselfishly. Finn nods, dropping his head onto Poe’s shoulder. Poe reflexively looks towards Jessika and Snap, who are giving him thumbs up and giggling to themselves. He rolls his eyes at them, which only encourages their giggling.

“I feel like I’ve lived a thousand days in the last two.” Finn whispers.

“Well get ready to add another thousand to today.” Poe says, standing up, pulling Finn up with him. “Come, let’s stop at my room for a minute.” Poe leads him down a hall leading away from the commotion happening near the hangar. He hasn’t been back to his room in days and has no idea what its current state is. He gets to the door and opens it for Finn.

“So, this is the famous Poe Dameron’s room.” Finn jokes as he steps into Poe’s space. The bed is unmade, there are clothes all over the floor. Poe looks at Finn’s dismayed face. “You would have failed every regulation check-in in the Order.” Finn laughs and makes his way to the bed and flops over.

“I wasn’t prepared for company.” Poe defends himself, “Otherwise, I would have tidied up a bit.” He pulls a shirt out of his closet. It’ll be nice to finally have a fresh change of clothes. He pulls his old blood stained, sand stained, sweaty shirt off and lets it drop to the floor. Poe’s eyes flicker to the bed, half-hoping Finn is watching him change. Finn is sitting up in the bed, and Poe catches his eyes as he stands shirtless before the younger man. Poe feels some of his old charisma and charm return to him as he holds Finn’s gaze. Finn, surprisingly, doesn’t break the eye contact and Poe’s heart begins to race.

“Poe.” Finn whispers, he stands up, and crosses the space between them. Poe looks up at Finn, they’re staring at each other like when they were on the starship waiting for the other to make the first move to escape. “Poe, I’m sorry for trying to run. I got scared. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s okay.” Poe reaches out to cup Finn’s face, a position that’s become so familiar and comforting for both men. “I’ve been there. Everyone here has. The important thing is you chose to stay. You’ve been through a lot, but now thanks to you we can end the First Order.” Poe pulls Finn closer, so their foreheads are touching. Poe feels Finn’s breath catch, and it causes a stirring he’s rather embarrassed about in their current context.

“Poe. I won’t leave you again. I’m sorry.” Finn’s now crying, in the comfort of their newfound privacy. Poe wipes his tears and can’t help himself from kissing Finn’s forehead, soft and gentle but the implication is nonetheless there. Finn pulls away slightly to meet Poe’s eyes, his tears halted for a moment and replaced by an earnestness that Poe hadn’t seen on the young man yet. Before he has a chance to register what is happening, Finn is leaning in to kiss Poe fully. Their lips meet and Poe sinks into Finn’s arms. This unspoken boundary finally crossed. Poe wants to forget about the war, pull Finn onto the bed and kiss him deeply, intensely. So of course, the fifteen-minute warning bell goes off, calling all pilots to their station. 

7.3.2

Poe reluctantly breaks off the kiss and stares at Finn. It would be all too easy to lean back into the kiss, to push Finn onto the bed and finally explore each other’s bodies. Poe can only imagine what Finn’s working with under his layers of clothing. Poe drags his hand across the back of Finn’s jacket, his jacket. Something about seeing the younger man in his old worn leather causes Poe’s heart to flutter and a warmer, deeper feeling a little further down. Neither man has moved since the warning went off instead choosing to hold each other in this tension-filled moment. The sounds of quickening footsteps become louder and louder on the other side of the door as more people head to their stations. Poe closes his eyes, not wanting to let go of Finn or their current position. 

“Poe—” Finn breathes slowly, his arms still wrapped around Poe’s bare torso. “Poe, we need to go.”

“I know.” Poe whispers back, “I just want to hold onto this moment for a second longer.” He opens his eyes again. Finn is staring down at him with a mix of worry, arousal, and something else Poe can’t quite place. Finn smiles a small smile, and moves one hand to cup Poe’s face, his long fingers stroking Poe’s cheek.

“When we get back, we can pick up right here.” Finn goes in for another quick kiss. Poe lets out a small gasp, in a lighter context he would have called Finn a tease.

“You promise?” is what he says instead, quiet and desperate. Something about Finn, maybe his intense vulnerability or Poe’s unshakable trust in him, has turned the pilot into a soft, hopeless romantic.

“I promise.” Finn says. Poe goes in for another kiss. He’ll never tire of this. He should have kissed Finn the second they found each other again on Jakku. Now, they’re off to battle, both their survivals uncertain. Poe wishes they could just exist here, in this moment, wrapped up in only each other, forever. Finn breaks off again and looks at Poe with a smirk. Poe grins back despite himself. 

“Okay. Let’s go.” Poe lifts his fresh shirt over his head and runs a hand through his mass of curls, catching Finn’s eyes as he does so. “Do you want a fresh shirt?”

“I’m okay, considering we’re late as is.” Finn laughs, then his demeanor shifts rapidly to tense as he heads towards the door. Poe catches up to him and opens the door.

“Hey, don’t stress. We’ve survived this far.” Poe wraps one arm around Finn as they enter the hall, other Resistance members pass them as they head to their various stations. “We’ll be back before you know it and have all the time in the world. You’ll be sick of me!”

“I don’t see how I’ll ever be sick of you, Poe.” Finn smiles, “Or sick of kissing you.” Poe laughs at this, it feels like a weight has been lifted off both of them, despite what they’re about to walk into. Poe can’t help but wonder if Finn’s done much more than kissing in the First Order. He doubts, because of Finn’s boldness in his room, that that was his first kiss. A conversation for later, Poe decides.

“Okay, I’m going to the Falcon now.” Finn announces as they reach the tarmac, but he doesn’t move from Poe’s side. Finn turns to face him, panic setting in on his features.

“Hey buddy.” Poe pulls him into a hug. “You got this. Go get Rey, disable the shield, and come back. I’ll meet you right here, and I’ll show you what I would have done back in my room had we not been so rudely interrupted.” Poe whispers into Finn’s ear, and is pleased with the shocked breath it pulls from the man. Poe gives Finn a quick peck on the cheek and then breaks their hug reluctantly. 

“Good luck, Poe.” Finn holds Poe’s gaze, his eyes riddled with anxiety, but underneath that there was a small glint of hope.

“May the force be with you, Finn.” Poe responds, and watches as the younger man walks towards the Falcon. Han and Chewy are standing underneath, and Poe’s stomach flips when he sees Han smirking back at him. The older man making it evident that he had witnessed his and Finn’s entire exchange on the tarmac. Poe nods at Han then turns awkwardly towards the x-wings and starts walking. 

“Poe!” Jessika calls out and runs towards him. “Poe, please tell. How does one resistance pilot go on a mission for a map and come back with an ex-stormtrooper boyfriend?” She playfully claps him on the back. Poe lets out a small laugh.

“It must be my undeniable charm.” Poe jokes as he gets to his ship, BB-8 already working to get everything ready. “And he’s not my boyfriend.” Poe adds, and Jessika raises her eyebrows. “Please, Jess. I really care about him. Don’t want anything to scare him away.” 

“Scare him away?” Jessika pretends to be offended. “Please, you know we all want the best for you. We’d never actually ruin your chances with the newest resistance dreamboat.” Jessika turns to look towards the Falcon, which has just taken off. Poe looks off as it leaves the base, his stomach in his chest and his heart on board with Finn. 

“Poe! Jess!” Snap walks over to them. “You guys ready?” Snap’s seriousness gets Poe to return to his body and the mission at hand. He realizes he’s about to lead these people on an impossible mission.

“Yes. Everyone to stand-by. We take off in two.” Poe says, and he climbs up the ladder into the cockpit. The roof of his X-wing slides shut overhead, and Poe takes one final deep breath before taking off, ready for the battle.


	4. Day Four.

7.4.1

Poe finally lets out the breath he was holding as his x-wing touches down, safely back on D’Qar. He leans his head against the controls for a second, letting his adrenaline rush come down. A few concerned beeps from BB-8 snap him back to the moment. 

“Yeah BB-8, we did it.” Poe laughs, and sits back in his seat as the roof of his x-wing slides open. He hops out, and practically flies down the ladder. Once his feet are back on the ground again, he looks around at the other x-wing pilots who made it back, only half of those who left for Starkiller base.

“Poe!” Jessika runs over, and Poe catchers in a hug. “Poe! We did it!” She’s crying, of relief, of grief. Poe feels his eyes well up to join her. They lost many good pilots today, and Poe’s heart breaks for them. But they got the job done, and while the First Order might not be destroyed, they’ve lost their greatest weapon. Poe hopes that everyone’s sacrifice will turn out to be worth it. Poe sees the Falcon land on the other side of the tarmac, Jessika follows his gaze.

“Go kiss your lover boy, Poe.” She teases, “Force knows you both deserve it.”

“Who says I haven’t already.” Poe winks at her and laughs at her shocked expression. He turns and runs down towards the Falcon. He slows down and starts to panic as he sees med personnel setting up a stretcher as the ship’s landing ramp lowers. Poe stand back and holds his breath, fearing the worst.

“Medic!” Rey shouts from the ramp. “Help!” Chewy roars as he runs down the ramp, holding a limp and unconscious Finn. Poe’s mind goes into panic mode. No, no, no. Poe didn’t survive until this point to lose Finn now.

“No! Finn!” Poe shouts and runs towards the wookie. He collects himself enough to make room for the medics to put Finn on the stretcher. Chewy is crying as he lets go of Finn. “Chewy, what happened? Where’s Han?” Poe turns to the Rey, who’s standing shell-shocked on the ramp. No one says anything else; the medics quickly sort out everything on their end and start to push Finn towards the base entrance. Glancing back at Rey, Poe starts following Finn, not wanting to leave his side.

“We have a pulse!” One of the medics say, and Poe sighs although he has stopped trying to stop the tears which form a steady stream. As they run past the x-wings, Jessika stands by in shock. Poe catcher her eyes and sees his sadness and panic mirrored back. Snap comes to stand next to her and they both give Poe a supportive nod.

Inside the med bay, Poe is forced to wait outside by one of the medical droids, so he paces desperately outside the room Finn is in. The worst-case scenarios are running through his mind. He can’t lose Finn, not now, not now that they’ve begun to explore exactly what they could mean to each other. It isn’t fair.

“Poe, I just talked to the head doctor.” Jessika walks up to him. “He’s gonna be in surgery for at least a couple hours. Why don’t you go shower and change?” Poe glances at her but doesn’t stop pacing.

“No. I need to stay here. I need to be with him.” Poe glances into the small operating room Finn is in. They have him on his stomach and are working on the large gash across his back. Poe gulps down another round of tears.

“Poe.” Jessika says unwavering. “What’s Finn going to say when he wakes up and finds you all gross and smelling like a sweaty cockpit? Have you showered since your mission to Jakku?”

“I changed my shirt.” Poe says, thinking back to his kiss with Finn. It feels like a lifetime ago now.

“See? Gross! You’re gross!” Jessika laughs, “Take care of yourself, Poe.” She adds, more seriously. “I’ll stay here, give you any updates when you get back. Go shower.” She says, a light ordering tone picking up. Poe can only nod and walks off in the direction of his room. The halls are oddly empty, most people must be in the caf drinking and celebrating the victory, or off mourning the dead in private. Poe’s glad to walk without crossing paths with anyone. He doesn’t want to be seen in his current state.

When he finally closes his bedroom door, he lets out a low, deep sob. He’s terrified that he might lose Finn. He already lost so many today, good pilots, good friends. All good people who wanted to fight for the good in the world, and now they’re gone. And Finn, the best person Poe’s ever met, who saved his life time and time again, was critically injured. And where was Poe to protect him? why wasn’t he there? He owed Finn that much. Finn, who wanted to escape the war. They should have left when they could. They could have had a normal, long life together. 

Poe strips down, feeling the cool air on his naked body. A relief to the current constraints his anxiety has on him. He steps into the shower and lets the hot water run down his face, his shoulders, his hips. Fuck, he forgot how nice a shower could be. He runs his hands through his wet curls. Tears still flow freely down his cheeks. He figures there’s no point stopping them while he’s alone. He goes through cleaning himself robotically, as if on autopilot. His mind is back with Finn in the med bay.

After several minutes, Poe steps out of the shower. He surveys his room, trying not to think of the events that transpired here mere hours ago. But Finn’s presence is still left in the room. It’ll probably never leave now, Poe realizes. This is why pilots, fighters, people at war avoid relationships, avoid feelings. Poe’s wrapped his hopeless romantic interior with the tough exterior flyboy playboy façade years ago. It was easy, hooking up with the new hotshot recruits, a few regulars in intel, hell even Snap once. But actual feelings were never on the table. How did Finn change all that? And so fast too. Poe grabs a grey button up and black pants and changes as quickly as possible. He wipes his eyes and resigns to the fact that he can’t help but look like he’s just cried out every tear in his body. His eyes are red and puffy beyond repair. With one final pathetic look at himself in the mirror, he heads back to the med bay.

7.4.2

In the med bay, Finn is finally stable, unconscious, but stable. The doctors told Poe that he will wake up, but they’re not sure when. Poe has assigned himself to stay by the man’s side. Jessika brought him breakfast this morning, the remnants of which are still on the table next to him. Jessika has been generally making sure he’s taking care of himself. It’s been a day since Finn was brought into the med bay, but it feels like an eternity of waiting. Poe’s dozing off in the chair next to Finn’s bed when Rey walks in. 

“Poe, I’m glad you’re here.” Rey says as she walks to the other side of Finn’s bed. Poe nods, taking in the look of Rey. They haven’t seen each other since the battle. Poe had hardly left Finn’s side since and Rey had apparently locked herself in her room, according to Jessika’s report.

“You okay, Rey?” Poe asks softly, “I was hoping to see you yesterday.”

“I couldn’t. I couldn’t get out of bed.” Rey whispers, leaning against the wall. “And I couldn’t fall asleep either. Every time I closed my eyes, I just saw Han, and Kylo Ren killing him. Then Kylo striking Finn down. Playing over and over.” Her voice breaks, and she drops her face in her hands. Poe gets up and crosses the room to Rey.

“Hey, Rey. It’s okay!” Poe pulls her hands away from her face. “Things like that, they stay with you, but it gets better with time. And you can always talk to me. It helps to talk about it.” Poe holds Rey in a tight hug, her face buried in his chest, small sobs escaping her tiny frame.

“And I couldn’t come here! And see Finn, see what that monster did to him.” Rey pulls away and wipes her eyes. “And it’s my fault! It’s my –” 

“It’s no one’s fault but Kylo’s.” Poe interrupts her. “You hear me?” Rey nods reluctantly, staring down at the unconscious Finn. She stares back up at Poe.

“I’m glad he has you.” She says, stifling her tears. “You’re good for each other.” She smiles softly and Poe can’t help but return the smile. 

“You have me too, Rey.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Rey says, slightly stern but a mischievous grin betraying her true intent. She lets out a small laugh as she wipes away some tears with her sleeve.

“Oh.” Poe feels himself blushing and takes a step back from Rey.

“I could tell when we were all on the Falcon.” Rey continues, “You two were so obviously pining for each other. I may have grown up a scavenger, but I still spent enough time around people to recognized you two had it bad.” She laughs, trying to stop the flow of tears as they start up again. “Just so you know, flyboy, you hurt him and I will come after you.” She jokes, and Poe chuckles.

“I don’t plan on it.” Poe says quietly, staring down at Finn wishing he could be present for this conversation. He returns to his seat and picks up the book he was reading before his impromptu nap which sent the book to the floor. It was a riveting volume on the history of x-wing modifications. 

“I met with Leia earlier.” Rey says, resuming a serious tone.

“How is she doing?” 

“Surviving, all things considered.” Rey smiles sympathetically. “That R2 unit, the one belonging to Luke Skywalker? Well, it woke up and had the rest of the map.”

“The map to Luke? We have the whole thing?” Poe perks up at this, Rey nods.

“I’m going to find him. Leia asked me, to see if he’ll train me.” Rey continues.

“She wants you to be a Jedi.” Poe smiles. Of course, it makes so much sense. Rey only nods nervously.

“I’m leaving now. Not much time to waste.” She says looking down, “I was hoping Finn would be awake, so I could say goodbye. I know I don’t have to ask you to look after him, but maybe, could you tell him I was here? That I miss him?” Her face looks worried.

“Of course, Rey.” Poe smiles, “and he’d want nothing less than Jedi training with Luke Skywalker for you.” Rey nods, and looks off through the glass door. “I’ll miss you too, you know.”

“And I’ll miss you Poe.” She says, crossing the room to hug Poe goodbye. “I’ll be back. Maybe not soon, but I will.” 

“And you’ll be a Jedi.” Poe adds, “I’m afraid you might be too cool to be my friend then.” He jokes, which receives a small chuckle. Rey heads to the door.

“Goodbye, Poe.” She says, and with that she leaves through the sliding door, leaving Poe and the ever-silent Finn alone once again. Poe holds the unconscious man’s hand and squeezes gently. 

“Hey buddy.” He says, stroking his thumb over Finn’s palm thinking back to their time on the Falcon only days earlier. His eyes a watery mess. He uses his other hand to wipe his eyes. He must have cried more in the last 24 hours than the prior months earlier. The hand wanders a little further down to the ring on a chain around his neck. His mother’s ring. It’s times like this that he wishes she was still around, to give him the guidance and checks he so needed from her. He looks down at the smooth lines of Finn’s face, so still and serene, as if completely unaware of the trauma the man had been through. “Stay with me, buddy. I need you here.” He whispers to Finn, hoping somewhere, on some level Finn can hear him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I just love these gay space boys so much!
> 
> Next I might do some fluff/filler fics starting where this one leaves off in between episode 7 and 8, stay tuned!


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